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Thursday, June 14, 2012

Diary of a Wimpy Parent

Imagine this:

You're a coach for a little league team.  You have a message from one of your players' moms saying this:  I'm sorry.  Bobby won't be at the game tonight.  He got in trouble earlier today and now he's just not motivated to go.  I told him the team was counting on him, but I just can't get him motivated.

Straight from the pages of a "Diary of a Wimpy Parent", don't you think?  Actually it's a true story.  I know....it's sad, isn't it?  Yes....it's true.  It really happened just last week. The coach is my husband and the kid is a player on his team.  And, guess what?  It was not only game day, but it was also team picture day!

When my husband told me this story, my response was, "I'll tell her how to motivate him!".  And I would.  But most likely, she wouldn't take my advice.....so I'll just tell you! (hee hee!)

Honestly, the thought that there are really parents that are unable to "motivate" their little 9 or 10 year old son to do something is just not something I can comprehend.  I mean....you're the PARENT!  You're THE parent!  YOU'RE the parent!  What more can I say?  Plenty, actually!

Of course, discipline would have needed to start before this episode and I'm thankful that the parent did say little Bobby actually got in trouble earlier in the day, but he's part of a team.  Letting him off the hook by not showing up for a game (unless there is another reason that is understandable, of course!) just because he's not motivated is just giving in to him and making the parent's job even harder the next time he does something wrong.  He won this battle.....and will win many more.

There will be many more battles in this families life, for sure.  And most likely the boy will always win.  But there's another side to the problem.  The side of the team.  He let down his teammates.  It doesn't matter if he's a key player or not a key player, he had an obligation and a commitment and he failed to do his job.  And the parent failed to do hers.

Again, there may be something that keeps a child from playing a game.  That's totally understandable.  For example, we would never put a ballgame above worshipping God.  Thankfully, we've only had a few times that has come up.  We're blessed where we live that Sundays and Wednesdays are left free from games.  I pray it stays that way!  Also, we would never make a child play if they were sick.  There are other reasons....but not just become they're "unmotivated".

Parents, if you struggle with being "wimpy" or anything else, please take the time to read a book called iY Generation by Tim Elmore.  I've not actually read the book, but I have used sermon notes of my brother-in-law about the book in some ladies' talks (Ladies' Night Out and Ladies' Days) in the past.  It is really, really good and gives some great points for parents.  The "wimpy" parent as he describes them as the "bullied parent" who is beaten down, exhausted, and drained emotionally.  This parent just finds it easier to give in to little Bobby than it is to deal with the problem.....which just creates even more problems.

God has given us, as parents a job.  It is our God-given responsibility and obligation to raise our children to be Christian young men and women who are also good citizens and good servants in His kingdom.  We should raise them, to the best of our ability to be good employees, good friends to others, responsible and trustworthy, and able to understand what it means to make a commitment.  After all....isn't that the example that Jesus showed to each of us?

We won't be perfect parents.  We'll make mistakes.  But, let's not let a mistake be that we allowed our children to be the boss of the home or that we never disciplined them or told them no....or in this case YES...you are playing that game!  That would be a tragedy.

He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.
Proverbs 13:24

1 comment:

Wa Wa Waughs said...

Sad, but remember, you may not be getting the whole story. Or the REAL story.

 
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