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Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Stuck Together Like Glue

In Sunday night's lesson that I mentioned in my previous post, Dr. Gilmore talked about "Keeping the Family Connected".  In a marriage, there is a commitment, or there should be a commitment, by both the husband and the wife.  The thoughts below are partly from him and partly from me.

The "Commitment Promise" is:

1. Exclusive: The commitment only involves the married couple - the husband and the wife.  Adding to this couple or taking away from it defiles the commitment.  In addition, "adding to" would also include homosexual relationships that are not God's design of marriage.  (Note:  *Hooray for Kirk Cameron who is speaking up about this subject in Hollywood.  For obvious reasons, Cameron is receiving a lot of backlash for his willingness to speak up about this hot topic.)

2.  Unconditional:  The marriage commitment is not based upon any conditions.  It remains intact through the good times and the bad times, through thick and thin (both physically and metaphorically).

3.  Enduring:  The commitment endures through all stages of marriage.  The honeymoon stage doesn't last long.

Dr. Gilmore mentioned that there are three stages of marriage, though these stages aren't original with him.

Stage 1 is the "Enchantment" phase, when everything is like fairytale life.

Stage 2 is the "Disenchantment" stage, when the fairytale image wears off and reality sets in.  At this stage both the husband and wife realize that their mate does have faults.  This is the hardest stage and depending on how both parties respond and react towards this stage will determine whether or not the marriage lasts until the final stage.  Sadly, we all know, many marriages don't make it through this stage.

Stage 3 is the "Maturity" stage, when the marriage commitment has made it through the tough times, realizing that neither the husband or wife is perfect or flawless, but that each spouse is willing to overlook those imperfections and stick to the commitment regardless.  Reaching the "Maturity" stage takes work, takes love, takes forgiveness, takes perseverance, takes selflessness, and takes a faith in God.

Tomorrow we'll look at the glue that holds the family together.

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